I hate…HATE…people who are hypocrites. Wikipedia (my second most visited place in the virtual world after…facebook…egads!) states “Hypocrisy is the act of persistently professing beliefs, opinions, virtues, feelings, qualities, or standards that are inconsistent with one’s actions. Hypocrisy is thus a kind of lie.”

And so in my view a hypocrite is someone who…gets ALL riled up by someone’s questionable behaviour…and then somehow ends up doing the EXACTLY SAME THING!! All the time professing to the world how their upbringing taught them to be a better person…or how their parents instilled better values in them.

Puh-lease!

I have only one thing to say to hypocrites.

You will crash. Crash and burn. To a crisp. No. Better yet…you’ll burn down into a putrid mass of a mess …that everyone usually refers to as a..

LOSER.

1. I have joined a school, where I’m teaching English Language and Literature to Grade 5 students…that comprises of two sections..each filled with around 20 over-smart 11 year olds…

2. I am inundated..every other day…with nearly 80 copies of classwork and homework copies..submitted in illegible handwriting that would make a doctor proud (N.B. I am guessing you got the joke since you MUST have come across a doctor’s prescription at least ONCE in your lifetime).

3. Their final examination is coming up… so I am rather bogged down with revisions and all the things that you have to do before such things…bleh!

and.. oh yes…as if I weren’t busy enough…I am also working on some ‘heavy’ (topic-of-research wise) Bengali-to-English translation work for an NGO…where everything ‘was due yesterday’.

So yes.. MIA is and will be the ‘in’ thing for me for the coming few weeks ..

Cheers! (and I DO mean it).

I have come to the irrevocable conclusion that childhood has its fair share of all things “Josh!”. You remain wonderfully ignorant of all the family politics and double (even triple) entendres made by members of your family. The older you get, unfortunately, everyone expects you to participate in all things “familial” and then when some sort of trouble brews, you’re expected to take sides… a pitfall ANYONE in their right minds would love to avoid at any cost.

NO human being is perfect. Every single person in ANY given family has their fair share of virtues AND vices. And more often than  not, rather than anyone being either right or wrong, it’s usually a case of a big, bad messy affair of miscommunication, where both parties have failed to understand each other’s point. A misunderstanding has NOTHING to do with anyone being right or wrong… a misunderstanding, in effect, is a VERY grey area and cannot be something SO black and white as being right or wrong.

Sorry am I going around in circles? Much apologies if I sound like a broken record, but all the family-related problems I’ve seen thus far seems to me just that… a very big and a very messy case of misunderstanding…where everyone has their wires crossed…tangled…maybe even shredded to pieces…

And I’ve always been the type of person who wants to avoid all things messy at all costs. One of my new year resolutions this time around was to keep busy with as much work and band-related stuff as possible in order to avoid as many family get-togethers as possible.

Seriously. The further removed you are from each and every scenario, the more easier it is to calmly say ‘Sorry, I wasn’t there, so I really can’t give my opinion on the matter’. I know that sounds extremely selfish (even more so, as it has to do with one’s own family) but well..I HAVE tried the other route… and never DID get ANY positive results/feedbacks/vibes for my efforts.

Other than my immediate family, including the one through my marriage, every other person’s opinion isn’t worth my precious time or my consideration. It’s a lesson learned the hard way.

Sorry. But that’s that. I know a lot of people will say.. “Awh c’mon. These things are constantly happening in every family. Don’t sweat the small stuff.”

But as one good friend always says, “It’s always the little stuff that makes or breaks things.”

THANK GOD!!

I am sure you can all guess that this was THE reason I’d sort of disappeared from the blogging world.

For a couple of examples of my efforts, have look here. Try to hum the words in your head in the original tune and maybe you could let me know what you thought of it all?

Ok. Time for some positive news now. WE BOUGHT A CAR! It’s a “third-hand” car. As in the previous owner had bought it second-hand himself. He’s actually one of our friend’s boss and was a real sweetheart as he sold it to us at a lesser price than he’d intended after hearing our budget crisis . And yes..I’ll be posting pics soon. Once we have it nicely washed, polished and in spick-and-span condition.

The car had increasingly become a necessity. Saif and I lead such a hectic life – we have shows every other week, and if not shows, then some sort of social get-together to attend. The part of Dhaka city where we live, though in a prime location, is rather cut-off from the main roads and we can somehow never manage to get a cab or cng when we NEED one. And more often than not..the driver usually goes “Jabo na” (Won’t go) . Even if we offer them double the fare! And then when you ask them in frustration and exasperation “Why ever not?”, they come back with the same retort or some godforsaken excuse like “Won’t get any commuters if I go to that particular neighbourhood”. Bleh!

So yes. We’re now the proud owners of a Toyota Carina.

Now if we could only do away with the 3-hour traffic jams in the city…Sigh.

Certain situations have been going round and round in my head, like one of those cheesy songs that get stuck in your brain and you just can’t seem to make it go away!

It deserves a good post .. as in one where I’m alone and am being able to gather my thoughts and put it into words which will make sense…

These days there just has been too many things on my plate for me to GET any time in-between ..

Need a little respite from it all .. Sigh

All I can say is that I so totally get John Lennon’s line from his song “Beautiful Boy” .. Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans..

So now Saif and I are trying to deal with Mr Life, who’s gone and done a whopper on Mr Plans…

Will write more on this when I feel like it…right now I’m a little lost for words…

I always get a great sense of contentment from finishing a household chore, say like doing all the piled-up dishes and getting a sparkly clean sink …or sitting in the sun and just breathing in the fresh wintry morning air of Dhaka..

Jaded people can come up to me and argue that I haven’t seen anything of life .. haven’t suffered any major hardships or setbacks … and so I can afford to be like this.

But then I’d like to believe that it’s something inside of of me.. that deep, deep down inside .. there’s a part of me ‘tuned’ to enjoying the jaded people’s so-called “insignificant” moments. And that even when I’m down and have had about as much as I could take of a terrible situation, my tuning will remain in the same frequency.

And my belief is strengthened when I see street urchins .. who I believe are facing hardships and setbacks on a day to day basis ..grinning from ear to ear while getting wet in the rain.

To paraphrase a famous quote from a film.. Jaded is as jaded does.

You can call me lazy. You can call me tactless. You can call me “not as social as the next person”. You can call me selfish. You can even say that I don’t posses a lot of common sense and that I can be very stupid at times. Because I know all of that to be very, very true.

But when someone calls me a liar – that in my book is going a bit too far. Everyone can be accused of “white lies”. Say when you tell someone that “Oh thank you so much for inviting us but we can’t make it to your get-together I’m afraid, as we have a previous engagement” when actually you don’t. You just wanted to make a very polite excuse to get out something without offending the other party. Everyone.. and I really DO believe.. everyone does their fair share of white lying.

You see I don’t have problems with making stupid mistakes. I AM human after all and I am NO model of perfection. Yes.. I will definitely be hurt if and when someone proclaims “God..you’re SOOO stupid! How could you DO such a thing???”. I’ll feel as if I’ve seriously let someone down. But I’ll be repentant and I’ll try to learn from that mistake and I’ll try to do better next time. Because being stupid makes me just that.. stupid. It doesn’t make me a mean person. But see.. lying, that too intentionally lying to hurt someone or even to put someone down .. that makes me out to be someone who’s extremely malicious and mean. It makes me out to be someone who has gone out of her way to trample with another person’s feelings and emotions.

Those who have known me for the past 29 years of my life can accuse me of being a LOT of things.. but they have never.. ever..  labeled me with the description above.

Maybe I should be more understanding and forgiving because the accuser in question has known me like what? Less than a year? That too, in sporadic time periods? And that it was difficult for that person to judge a situation without  witnessing it for real? But it still hurts even when I try to think it from the other person’s end. Especially since I had really looked up to that person. As someone who sees the bigger picture. Someone who at least asks for the other side of the story before reaching any conclusions. Someone who doesn’t see the world as purely black and white. Someone who knows that gray areas surely exists in this everyday struggle that we call “life”.

Well… I guess I was proven wrong. And maybe I am better off knowing the hard facts.

That perhaps who I had thought to be someone really close never did reciprocate the same feelings towards me, so I shouldn’t have expected so much of that person in the first place.

And that maybe, it’s safer to be open and free.. to be truly “you”.. with only a few people in your life. We should be so lucky to have at least one person who totally gets you.

And that perhaps “gray” is a colour that maybe only some of us can see at times.

Momentary musings is also an outlet for most of my “creative writing” efforts … which are few and far between

Simz City is more of a diary (if you haven’t guessed that already from the posts) .. filled with all my frustrations and rantings … and on the flip side of the coin, contentment and happy times …

I hope you’ll all enjoy my other half.. at least those of you who will feel like reading it of course ..

Cheers!

My dust allergy is a little better than the last couple of days… but I think the recent “work” that I got commissioned with is hindering a more.. speedier.. recovery.

I am a copywriter by profession and since last June, I’ve been working as a freelance one as opposed to a full-time one.. in a respectable firm.. foregoing the pleasures of a steady, respectable income. The reason I’d left in the first place was due to the wishful thinking that I’d be leaving the country soon.. for good. So much for that! (I’m back to looking for a full-time job again).

So day before yesterday, I was presented with an opportunity to undertake a work that would be a source of great pride for my country.. and mine as well (for having done it). A long-standing organization/ authority of my country wants to make a compilation album of our most famous patriotic songs.. songs from and about the era of 1971.. that tells of the heartache and loss, of victory and patriotism, and of the human spirit  and determination.

You’re probably thinking… didn’t banglalink just do something similar just a couple of months back? Well yes.. but the difference here is that 1. that particular compilation of songs were pre-war/ victory songs.. inspirational songs that had been mainly written and composed to arouse one’s sense of patriotism.. songs to fuel one’s resolution to fight for what was, in the true sense, freedom of rights and freedom of speech, and 2. this latest selection of songs encompass both the pre and post-war emotions and experiences and will need to be translated into English and recorded in English and then distributed worldwide by 21st of February, which since 1999, has been the International Mother Language Day (as declared by UNESCO). The main idea here is to create awareness amongst people worldwide of the language movement and the immense sacrifice that our country made for such a basic human right.. that many take for granted.. and to appreciate the beauty and the depth of emotion in the lyrics of these amazing songs.

So… guess who has taken the responsiblity of doing the translations? Yes.. yes.. I’m getting handsomely paid but bloody hell!.. this is just not your off-the-beat translation that we’re talking about here! I have to maintain at least a modicum (if not the same degree) of romanticism and also ensure that the end result can be sung in harmony with the same beat and tune as was used with the original Bangla lyrics! No small feat mind you! And I have till Saturday to finish the first 15 lot.. while having to juggle a host of other “to-do’s” over the same time period.. and I JUST CAN’T PUT MY MIND TO IT!!!!

Anyone who’s ever tried to translate a piece or writing from one language to another (be that one of them is your mother tongue) must know that SO much is lost in translation ..about.. 99.5%???

So here I am.. at 1:38 AM in the morning … with a still rather stuffed-nose .. and a very, very, very difficult task ahead of her… simply putting off doing the inevitable…

And blogging about it ..

Sometimes I hate myself…